So as I was in the middle of a crisis at work this morning, I saw a little boy walking to school all bundled up with a backpack on his back. He went straight into the huge pile on snow in my front yard. He knew there was a big rock there that was totally climbable now with all the snow. He got to the top of the rock and just stood there for a moment. I wondered what he was up to and then it happened. He fell straight backwards into my snow filled yard. I giggled wildly for a few seconds as I enjoyed the moment. Unfortunately, it wasn't as pleasant for the boy as he ended up with snow up his back.

I remember every moment of when I did that when I was a kid. Just letting yourself fall and even the snow in unpleasant places. It hurts more now.

Right now, there's nothing wrong but still there's a feeling of things not being right. I don't know exactly what it is.

My car died last night as I was driving. Luckily, it was right in front of a friend's apartment building. It was the second time in the evening my car wouldn't start and I'd had to call CAA. Now it's at the shop. I heard about another friend terrifying episode in her parking lot. Someone tried to steal her car while she was in it. When the door was locked, the attacker smashed the window with a hammer. I feel so bad for her because it takes a really long time after something like that to not feel scared.

My sweetie and I grow closer every time I stop to notice which is less often than you might think considering my self-analytical nature. He's very good for me and makes me happy.

Friday at work was interesting. I don't know if I overstepped my bounds or not, but I did get something done. I won't be doing anything like that again anytime soon, though. I was a bit agitated when I caused the ruckus I did. I was upset enough to stop being nice to people I didn't know.

The kittens are getting closer too. I witnessed the brat allowing the little one to clean him this morning for quite some time. I did get them very stoned on fresh catnip last night.

I can feel that I'm still trying to avoid work because I have some difficult tasks (for me) ahead. I have a plan and I know I just have to do it and it will all be good, but I don't want to. However, if I want to be a good manager, I have to start being good at giving all kinds of feedback not just the good stuff. I really have to get better at giving negative feedback. I avoid that as much as possible.

So, as I said, there's nothing wrong. Just life being ... life-y. Maybe it's the weather that's causing this feeling.

I like visitors. It makes me happy to be able to do things for my friends and with my friends. This weekend, I had visitors from Edmonton. Not as many as usual, but still good. They brought me a present of thanks that made me very, very happy. It's fuzzy and warm and happy. The kittens like it too.

Cori summed up portions of my weekend fairly well. Cheruby and I was there for soup and biscuits too after the playing at Lydia's. They were very yummy. I was coerced earlier with cookie dough. It was really good to see the plague bearer. It's really been way too long.

So we made plans with brain exercise girl and Cheruby to play kaiser and watch movies on Sunday. It was really good, but seemed like just a start and not quite enough. I know plague bearer is busy so I don't bug him often, but it was very awesome to see him.

Then my mom was here last night and this morning. It was very good to see her too. It's always very good to see her. She made it home safely this evening and even in time to get a flu shot and see her new puppy. Yes, my parents are getting a new puppy. Apparently, my dad wouldn't mind the black one. Heh.

I know that the Californian friends must be dreadfully disappointed that they missed the snow by two days. We got a schwack. Enough that it seems that winter came overnight. I was so happy not to have to drive into the office Wednesday or Thursday this week. Traffic was horribly slow outside of rush hour. Crazy business that. It's so pretty. I've been very tempted to make a snow angel in my front yard.

Shovelling the walk wasn't even that bad. I didn't dig out the back gate or the walk along the side of the house. I didn't really feel the need. Of course, if the Sidekick ever moves, we'll have to dig out the back gate so someone else can park there, but alas, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. I think my alley is a lot easier to drive down than the street in front of my house.

My boss said to me on Wednesday, "Isn't it too early for the snow to stick around?" I laughed heartily at that. He's from Ontario. Ottawa to be more specific. Apparently, he never had to dress for Hallowe'en over a snow suit.

I'm on vacation right now. The last one of the year before we get into our busy season at work so I'm visiting my mom and dad. I haven't been here in much too long. Cheruby may have had something to do with that, but it was still my choice. I brought the kittenses home with me. I just got them to a point where they weren't missing me all the time from being out of the house. Going away for four days would likely ruin all that so I brought them with me. It was the little one's first lengthy car ride. She was nervous at first and had to use the litter box, but after that she was good and slept next to me for most of the trip. The big brat probably had a calming influence on her as he did his usual sleep thing. Although getting him into the car is usually a fiasco, once he's there, he's fine. The fiasco this time included the little one freaking out big time when the big brat came near in the house. I think she smelled his fear and didn't know what was going on because he's never scared, right? That's my working theory anyway. Cheruby and Rilla were there to help me herd the cats which was a big help because usually it's several trips to the house and back to get them into the car and get the house locked up and all that jazz.

I'm surprised I'm not missing the warmer weather. Winter seems to be good so far this year despite the awful driving.

Yesterday afternoon, in between some event or another related to Drang & Sally's wedding, I was questioning the role I play in my social circle. I believe I was musing this to Cheruby, but it really could have been anybody. In large groups, I don't contribute a lot to conversation and I'd rather just be off having a conversation with one person about something close to me. I don't have a lot of education so I don't like to participate in intellectual conversations because my knowledge of subjects is typically shallow and new concepts need to needle into my brain before I can discuss them with any confidence. I haven't many hobbies that interesting enough to talk about for more than three minutes and my job is as a manager which has challenges similar to every other manager job making it not that discussion worthy either. Having said all that, I don't feel completely out of place. I just like to be surrounded by my people and be able to put a smile on their face in whatever small way I can - either with a beer in hand or laughing a joke (rarely ingeniously if ever) or any other small attention that lets my people know I care. I used to be better at small talk and being "on" but fell out of practice and some lost desire to be able to make small talk. Then Drang, just a few hours later, paid me a very good compliment by echoing my thoughts. Just after I'd started into a fit of giggles about some silly joke someone told and had to repeat, "This is why we like having Suzi around. Just a little thing and you get rewarded with that laugh." Or something like that. It made me happy. I think I cried.

I was very tired yesterday and cried tears of joy about at least a dozen times including 3 times during the wedding ceremony including during the strip show as laughter is a release, once when I hugged Drang, once when I hugged Sally five seconds later, and twice when I was driving a friend from work to the reception. There many more times of tears, especially in talking with one of my best friends who I rarely get to talk to anymore because of location and being so busy.

And just so I don't forget. The JP was on Quaaludes and it felt a bit like Romper Room. I see cenobyte and his nibs and sprogs and r:tag and tuo and buttery b and mr. tall and furlak and bne and... and it was good. [sniff]

Went to a party tonight and got home at 3:30 a.m. It was really, really awesome. I haven't stayed that late at a party. I even had a beer in between many caffeinated beverages. Hence why I'm still awake.

I'm so happy for my friends who are getting married next weekend. I was told once that a tiger is hard to catch. Apparently, it takes another tiger. And it's good.

And I think I'm going to get to see him more often because I'm going to be playing in Low Life that he's going to be running. It's very exciting.

And tomorrow, or I should say tonight, we're going to flush out more of our characters from our cabal for Mage: The Awakening. I've got the pretty book back for reading before our meeting tomorrow. Then I'll pass it back to Cheruby for his further perusal. At some point, Kazanj is going to want it again too. This is going to be so much fun!

Lastly, I have to finish fleshing out my character for In Nomine - goals, beginnings, and all that. I have the basics down on paper, just no personality for her yet.

This joke was sent around work today with the Subject line of "A 'Suzanne' joke to end the day!" I guess I'm flattered. [grin]

A man was walking home alone late one foggy night, when behind him he hears something.



BUMP...



BUMP...



BUMP...



Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog. He makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.



BUMP...



BUMP...



BUMP...



Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him.



FASTER...



FASTER...



BUMP...



BUMP...



BUMP...



He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.



However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping



clappity-BUMP...



clappity-BUMP...



Clappity-BUMP...



on his heels, the terrified man runs.



Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.



With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.



Bumping and clapping toward him.



The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!



Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...




















and,




the coffin stops.




Happy Hallowe'en everyone! Mwa-ha-ha-ha...

____________________________
This joke was first presented to me at a werewolf moot by a certain very tall gentleman. It still makes me happy to think about that. It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

I didn't remember turning on the basement light. So when I got home tonight, and it was on, I was surprised. Then I found a note from my mom on the counter. My mom was in the basement as a pleasant surprise. She has an appointment tomorrow.

I didn't remember turning the VCR off. So the timer didn't go tonight. I missed Gilmore Girls. The synopsis of an episode never holds the same value. [pout] Maybe I'll get lucky with some reruns.

I'm still glad to see my mom.

Today is the 6-month anniversary of my first date with Cheruby. I'm very happy. Can you feel the happy? You should be able to because it's very powerfully happy. Much more powerful than cenobyte's Manchurian Melfing Sickness.

So I went to my first ever drag show last night and it was awesome. I was giddy when I picked her up just because I was actually feeling pretty good. I cleaned up my backyard yesterday. It looks like I got robbed, actually. So barren. Right, drag show.

My brain was in a particularly peculiar state to which got me to thinking about a lot of strange things while sitting there in the oontz-oontz music which was too loud to try to have a normal conversation waiting for the show to begin. Old friends and their exes in compromising situations because I thought the ex might be there in the diverse crowd and what had ever happened to her anyway? Also looking at the diversity of the folks out for such an event was fun. The guy in the green stripping shirt that kept making Rilla think she was in a movie by spontaneously breaking out into dance behind her. And this guy really moves when he dances. And then there was the flirty girl in the red shirt. Obviously, her friend who got stuck purse watching several times in the evening has a huge crush on her. Poor guy, but she's not right for him anyway. A couple started dancing on a table and he lifted her up to girate on his hips. That stuff only happens in the movies, right? The diversity in the crowd really did astonish me because I obvious don't get out much. It was at Louis' so I expected a more university crowd, but it wasn't, it was the Diva's crowd which makes more sense to me. So diverse.

Now, the show was great. I laughed my ass off because some were so funny and others were so good. There did a fantastic rendition of the dance number from Thriller. There were some "brothers" who did a montage of songs which included Mahna, Mahna which made me think of Kazanj which made me imagine him up on stage doing the number which just about killed me with laughter. Of course, they ended their musical number with a song about choking your chicken which was very, very funny. The final performance was of Vogue. I realized that the gaggle of girls that had been watching behind us weren't singing along with that song and I felt a little old, but only old enough to be able to appreciate more jokes and old enough to think they have so much to learn and experience yet. I was impressed by how good the drag queens looked. I mean, it takes the same discipline (or natural metabolism) to be skinny whether you're a boy or a girl, but dang! There was a sensational version of some Justin Timberlake song that I don't quite know, but the guy was really, really good. I think someone around me called it "Sexy Back" but I'm not sure. It was very, very good. I don't even remember all the performances last night which is really too bad because they were all so good.

Proceeds went to the USSU LGBTA Centre Bursary Fund.

I went to work today, but was lying on my home office floor by 3:20. You know, just in case someone tried to contact me cuz I was feeling really useful. All bad. Then I went to bed.

Only up now because mom stopped by and had to get something on her way to Calgary.

And then checked my email. There are rewards in life. I nearly peed myself laughing so hard at this from her. Of course, I just scared the cats with the high-pitched squeal involved when I laugh that hard, but it was so worth it.

Thanksgiving went well. I freaked out as usual. I can't seem to make it through a family gathering at my house without freaking out. Ah well, they love me anyway and I love them.

I was made incredibly happy by R&R's attendance at Thanksgiving dinner. There was much tomfoolery with my niece and nephew, especially my nephew. He's a quiet kid normally, but he bloomed into the centre of attention that evening. And my niece, who is usually the centre, just let it be that way. I was quite proud of her, actually. She shared the spotlight or went and found someone else to pay attention to her.

We celebrated my dad's 60th that weekend too. I love him very much. It was really good to see him and he fixed my front stoop. He's a good man.

A few short (but very, very long) days at work and I had a vacation day on Friday the 13th because I don't work on any Friday the 13th if it can be helped. Just a general rule I like. Makes me happy.

So Cheruby and I went to his uncle's cabin for the weekend. We left on Thursday night and had a very relaxing weekend without any obligations of our real lives. Lots of game playing. They taught me Civilization although we didn't finish the game. I read a lot in my pretty new Mage book. We're getting together a cabal for the new Mage LARP. It's going to be hella fun.

I felt so wonderful after the weekend away. Monday at work was so much more manageable. Then I got to hear my Cheruby play at Cluricaune that evening before coming down with melfing and the runs. Thanks to Cenobyte for that. And this.

***





Find your Celestial Choir
***


Got a half day work in yesterday before getting too exhausted to go on. Then Cheruby got the Manchurian Melfing Sickness. And then I almost started again, but maybe it was just sympathy. So today, I'm really hungry and scared to eat. Rightfully so, everything zoooms through very quickly - too quickly. More than you wanted to know, but I'm in a sharing mood.

Taking it easy today. Decided that work can wait until the weekend when I can think in full sentences. Maybe finish some of my outstanding work and get organized a little. Maybe not.

I took today off work so I could prepare for my family's visit this weekend. I had all last night to start the process too.

So, Purrrsia's finally level 44 in City of Heroes. I've also created a new hero in anticipation of Issue 8. YAY! Free costume modifications are good. My newest is on Champion - Dryad Huntress. Very exciting. I also noticed that Purrrsia has 24 free costume changes. Heh.

I was reading Neuba's blog and she was mentioning how she doesn't have a lot to say these days. I have to say I know how she feels. Even though I am working - it's the same work that I've been doing for quite a while now. And it has it's ups and downs, but whining about it on my blog isn't going to make anything better. And in fact, will likely make them worse because I'll be dwelling on them. The best I can do is just keep my focus and keeping doing my best - accept what I need to and keep being there for my team. It's rewarding and frustrating when I can't support them.

Now, I'm watching the old Battlestar Gallactic. It's very amusing - the costumes and special effects. It reminded me of an upcoming event on October 7 on Space that I'm really excited about which doesn't have anything to do with trailer trash. That's tomorrow. SQUEEEEE!!

I hope everyone has a very happy turkey day. I am very thankful for all my wonderful friends and family wherever in the world you may be. Here's to hoping that you are all healthy and happy and in good company.

I giggled a lot so I'm sharing.



Darth Tater

This week hasn't been the most wonderful. Work went south very quickly. My staff are so amazing though. After being told of the situation, one of them even volunteered to take on some of the work. I cried. They're so great. I wouldn't love my job as much without them.

There was some annoying stuff with this loan that I got. Stupid folks had my wrong home phone number and so they kept calling me at work after I repeatedly told them not to. AND they couldn't call me by my middle name no matter how many times I told them that either. Well, the first person I talked to was great, but the others have been annoyingly oblivious of the meaning of good customer service. The guy didn't show up for our meeting and then showed up later to find the nasty note I left him on my door. We finally got the deal done, but I was pretty frustrated before it got that way. And to make this meeting that the guy didn't show up for, I had to leave an important board meeting for the charity I volunteer for because the number he'd given me to reach him had been out of order all day.

Then a meeting was cancelled, but no one bothered to phone me, just an email to my home account which I didn't have access to during the day. So I showed up because I have to go there straight from work to make it on time. No meeting.

Tonight, I went to MacNally Robinson to look around and get a present for a friend. Cheruby and I spent some time looking around before heading back to my house... to a broken garage door. Some jack@ss ran his/her car into my garage making it inoperable. My garage door is dented and broken. And the one wall is 3 to 4 inches displaced from its usual home. The police were nice enough to drop by and take a look and give me a file no. They're not going to investigate any further, but they were nice about it.

And then there's all the other stuff that didn't go right this week.

Good stuff:
- People ordered Tupperware from my party last week even though only one other person besides my mom came. And I get free stuff.
- Got that loan I wanted.
- Got to meet my boss.
- Another week with Cheruby making me smile.
- Ordered a beautiful blue shawl.
- Mom and dad are coming up next week and for Thanksgiving.
- Got to see lots of friends recently that I haven't seen in much too long.
- Went into work and actually got to socialize with my coworkers rather than just be connected to the phone in my little corner of the office.
- Made plans to visit more friends in a week and a half.
- Booked some vacation days to help me relax.

See? Lots more good than bad.

How is it that I know that I have a good reputation at work, I have a good relationship with my boss and I still am nervous about meeting him in person? I got all caffeinated at work today just so that I could be talkative at dinner tonight with him.

He's so short. One of my coworkers actually said that I was bigger than him. And yes, I am, and not just around. He's quite vertically challenged. How wrong would it be to mock him as I so dearly want to? Heh.

So here I sit - tired and too caffeinated to sleep.

Ril and I were girly girls last night. Makeovers and learning how to put makeup on. Fun stuff. So much so that Rilla wanted to do it again, but go through a whole colour analysis. So we are in a couple of weeks. Such girly girls.

Of course, getting that stuff off my face was a little more than I bargained for. Wait, it was all free, nevermind. Heh.

And I got a very pretty wedding invitation in the mail. I love weddings.

Fresh warm plums just off the tree are really, really good. Sometimes, they're small enough to just pop right in your mouth and explode when you bite into them. Warm plum goodness fills your senses. It was a really great walk around the yard with my Auntie Cool. She's very awesome and made me have a nap after having plums.

Caffeine can keep one awake even on a lonely drive between Edmonton and Saskatoon after a day at the office and one episode of Six Feet Under with a friend. A friend who can supply much of said caffeine. Oh, and there was sugar.

Being there for an employee's first day makes a difference into how welcome that new team member feels. I was very happy to be able to be there for that.

Seeing a loved one after being away for a while is a joyous occasion. Five days is nothing compared to an entire summer, but it's still enough to make me very thankful to be home. Cuddling with kittenses who missed me is also very good for the soul. With that much love, it is pretty much impossible to stay stressed.

Being on a budget and a diet while travelling is really, really hard. Good thing I have understanding and supportive friends.