I've been hanging out with my boys, Furlak and Bne, and missing my sweetheart who didn't come with me this time. Of course, that's just my physical location.

Walking around the mall yesterday with Siochain was good for me. I wanted to buy shoes, but didn't feel very well. Not in my tummy, but in my head. Things just seemed wrong. I'd been trying to talk to her about some serious stuff, but I wasn't being much help because I didn't feel like I was truly there. She made me laugh and told me I was pretty.

In between looking at shoes I didn't feel like buying because no one was being nice to me (they weren't being not nice either) and being told I'm pretty, I realized that all of things with the house this year had taken their toll on my psyche. Not being outside in the summer to de-stress in the sunshine, not knowing when my neighbour might flip out at me next, having to spend gobs of money to fix everything, and above all, all the time and waiting it takes to fix all these things and it being out of my control. I had to ignore most of it after I'd done my part, but keep it relevant so that it still got done. It's almost all taken care of now except the parts where I get to be in control, so things are looking up dramatically.

All the stress with those things are low level, but didn't mix well with the work stress and all the energy I put into my daily life. So something had to give and it was my ability to truly let go and be happy and cheery and desire to be social. I hadn't laughed at Cheruby's jokes in a long time. I was still being nice most of the time, but that's not enough. I was almost completely focused on people other than myself. It's easy to do especially when my whole job is focusing on other people. The only time I was focused on me was when I felt I wasn't being nice and that's not good attention even though necessary.

A couple weeks ago I was actually laughing at Cheruby's jokes and it felt really, really good. Work got in the way again, but I'm on vacation now and am feeling better already.

So many things pulling me in so many directions today.

First, it was an not early enough morning. I was a few minutes late for work. I would have been later if Cheruby hadn't gotten up with me and made me a quick breakfast and packed my lunch. Such a sweetie.

I got a phone call from my brother at work today too. And he gave me some happy news that made me stand up and exclaim loudly for joy! He applied for and was just offered the Manager of Saskatchewan for his company. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! That means he's moving away from evil Calgary. He's moving to Regina, but it's still 400 km closer. I'm soooo excited for him. He was in a bit of shock this morning. We'll see what he says in a couple of weeks when I see him.

I've been having trouble concentrating all day, but managed to get through because work sometimes just gets in my face and doesn't let me not focus on it.

Then Cheruby gave me a message from the Scotia Bank. Apparently, my mortgage payment is overdue. WHAT!?!?! I tried to be calm. We sorted out that they tried to withdraw it from the wrong account and the guy asked me whether I wanted to call my bank to sort it out or if I wanted him to. I was still doing mini-freakouts in between perfectly rational conversation about the situation. I told him that I wanted whatever was easier to fix it. He offered to call and then follow up with me once it was all done. They were going to back date the payment so there wasn't anything in my history about a late payment. I'm feeling more sane and I think I'll call my banker tomorrow.

While I was on hold, I think I got a little tense because I all of a sudden had a horrible pain in my chest like my ribs were rubbing together. It didn't go after stretching and breathing to relax after the call so I made an appointment to see my chiropractor. I was lying on the table resting and trying to make my chest muscles relax so I could be in less pain and it occurred to me to look at my day planner. I swore a couple times. I actually had an appointment yesterday that I missed and a doctor's appointment this morning that I missed. GAH!!! Why have I all of a sudden started missing appointments?!?! Anyway, I'm trying not to stress about it and I'll make another appointment tomorrow. My guilt is really the only thing that I need to get over as it screams, "But you're the dependable one!" Don't worry though, the pillow smothers most of the noise. [grin]

Then wonderful supper from Cheruby, one of my favourites chili-lime kabobs. Mmmm...

And just a few minutes ago I found some mail at the front door. Cheruby forgets to tell me when exciting things happen sometimes. This mail was from some really cool people that I wish I could spend way more time with but they are too far away. I got cool dice in the mail today! Can you say the same? [GRIN]

Every since someone said that it's boring to blog about your pets, I've been seriously trying not to. They bring such joy to my existence every day that it's really hard not to talk about them. Well, you're going to have to suck up the boredom because I laughed for a really long time at these incidents.

Cats, in my house, are not allowed on the counter. Do they go there anyway? All the freakin' time! But they know they aren't supposed to be there so they flee as quickly as possible which is usually much more quickly than I can extricate my from what I'm doing to catch them. I may have mentioned that one of my kiddenz is quite dumb. She's very pretty and that makes up for it, but she's still my dumb one. Her first route of escape was the back porch after jumping down from the kitchen counter. There's no way out from the back porch except back through the kitten where I was now standing. In a very bold maneuver, she ran through the kitchen and down the basement stairs. I have never seen a cat move this fast inside a house. She was a blur. And when a cat launches itself down a flight of stairs going that fast, it's not likely that they are going to touch the stairs at all. The effect is very flying squirrel-like. She was half way down the stairs and still 2 feet above them. It was way too funny. I feared, in between the fits of laughter, that she'd hit her head so hard on the freezer at the bottom that she'd seriously hurt herself.

Then sometime when my dad was here doing work on the house, we let the kiddenz outside. This isn't unusual and they are happiest when their humans are outside with them anyway. My dad and I are working on the new front step and there comes this kitten crying. I thought it was coming from between the houses so the kitten must be at the back of the house. I go to the back, but it gets quieter. I check inside the house, but can hear absolutely nothing. Back outside to the front of the house because I must have been imagining things. Nope, there's the kitten crying again and louder now and from the same direction. As I moved between my house and the neighbour's toward the back, it was getting quieter again so I stopped and called. And all of a sudden it was REALLY loud. Yes, there's my dumb one - on the roof of the neighbour's house. Then she was effortlessly on my roof. And then back to the neighbour's roof. All the time crying because she wanted down. It's hard to decide between rescuing a dumb kitten and laughing at her for a while. Sorry, I didn't get any pictures. Who says cats with no front claws can't climb trees?

So much for doing nothing on my vacation. My dad made sure I kept very busy with fixing up my house. I even got to use a jack hammer.

Of my previous list, here are the results.

• organize my craft area in the basement - not quite, but I did get some good shelving in the basement to help with the process
• hang pictures of mine and Cheruby's loved ones on the walls - not even close
• fix the back gate and fence - the back gate is fixed thanks to my dad
• clean up the debris in the front and side yards - three quarters done as my dad helped by removing some of the branches from the pine tree at the back and the cedar tree in the front and he completely removed the nasty juniper tree I didn't like and the old rotting bug-infested stump was mostly removed too
• pull some large weeds and bag them so they don't spread their seeds - got a bit started in patches around the lawn, flower beds, and garden and got all the roots dug up for those nasty purple flowers in the front
• collect other flower pod seeds for next year - nope but if the beautiful weather keeps up for a few more days, I might get there
• make some repairs around the house to make it more energy efficient - didn't quite get started on this yet, but I have another year and then some to get it all done to get the rebates
• paint touchups - nope
• organize the back entryway - nope and I think it got messier
• put up the garden hose holder - nope and this one should have been easy
• organize the garage - I threw out a lot of old boxes which has made a lot more room again but the organizing didn't happen
• play video games - sadly not really [pout]
• embroider a picture - yes! I did get some work done on this project
• start Christmas crafts - I ordered them and received them on Friday (I love getting packages in the mail)
• think of a Hallowe'en costume - I did do some thinking but just didn't come up with anything
• go shopping for a broom, shelving brackets, ladders, gutter cleaning hose contraption, saw horses, fabric, and whatever else I want - ooo... I think this one because boy, did I shop! I got a broom, ladder, gutter cleaning hose contraption, and lots of other things I wanted like the first Post Secret book and some stuff at Michaels
  
• schedule a pedicure - no and I feel like I've disappointed one of my staff members on this one as she was really expecting it of me so I'll have to make an appointment for my next vacation in October
• get shelving for the basement - I did it!!!
• finish the edge of my desk and re-affix the leg - [sigh] nope
• Verathane my pine shelves and get them up on the walls - nope
• watch movies - yep, we watched movies, but not very many (just the weekly movie and Nanny McPhee and A Good Year)
• read - I'm almost done reading Good Omens and am very pleased so far

Other exciting things that got accomplished while I wasn't doing the other things on my list were visiting with mom and dad, jackhammering out my falling apart front step and building a new one, removing the bad part of the old chimney, 5 trips to the dump with various wasted from the front step, chimney, and trees (I really like the sound of bricks and concrete echoing off huge metal bins), and ... getting eavestroughing on my house!!!!! Yes, you heard me, Rainbow Roofing be damned as my dad came to my rescue and put rain gutters on my house. I don't think I can say enough how much I love and appreciate my dad even when he starts a fight with my neighbour when he says, "Hi," on a perfectly lovely Sunday morning. He was just being protective of me because I'd been so upset over the whole thing. He threatened my neighbour saying that if he ever made me cry again, he'd have to deal directly with him. My dad had the luxury of saying all the nasty things to my neighbour that I'd wanted to say, but didn't feel that I could and still ever have the hope of having a good relationship. While he made it so that I had to go smooth things out with the neighbour again, I think they finally understood the impact their actions had on me.

So, there are some finishing touches that need to happen like paint on the new front step railings, put up eavestroughing on one side of the garage to ensure I meet all the city bylaws in regard to this matter before they come to inspect it in a month and a half.

I was even sick one day last week and helped Babyface move again. The new location is fantastic though and much better suited to Babyface and family.

I am three weeks away from my next vacation and hope I can keep up some steam to do the last finishing touches around the yard and stuff. And I'd like to get up to visit my folks and hopefully help them with some stuff since they've been so generous with their time and energy in the past two weeks.

And the last thing is that the Fat Brat and Little One slept together while touching for the first time last night. I was infinitely pleased.

And I have no idea what to do. I didn't make any plans. It's a vacation from doing anything. How could I have done this? I DON'T HAVE ANY PLANS! And as a result, I had a nap because I was bored. Then the phone rang and woke me up so now I'm awake and not doing anything because I was so psyched to not have to do anything.

So, 8 hours into my vacation, I've decided I need to plan some stuff so that I know what I want to do instead of just sitting here with a blank, stress-free mind.

So in the next week, I'm going to attempt to do the following:

• organize my craft area in the basement
• hang pictures of mine and Cheruby's loved ones on the walls
• fix the back gate and fence
• clean up the debris in the front and side yards
• pull some large weeds and bag them so they don't spread their seeds
• collect other flower pod seeds for next year
• make some repairs around the house to make it more energy efficient
• paint touchups
• organize the back entryway
• put up the garden hose holder
• organize the garage
• play video games
• embroider a picture
• start Christmas crafts
• think of a Hallowe'en costume
• go shopping for a broom, shelving brackets, ladders, gutter cleaning hose contraption, saw horses, fabric, and whatever else I want
  
• schedule a pedicure
• get shelving for the basement and hopefully get one
  
• finish the edge of my desk and re-affix the leg
• Verathane my pine shelves and get them up on the walls
• watch movies
• read

If anyone has any other ideas about what I could do this week, let me know because I'm not actually going to work this hard. [grin]

We started with supper at Taverna as Cheruby's celebration dinner for being a semi-finalist. It was fabulous as usual. I think we both ordered the same thing this time as we did last time. Except I also ordered the chocolate mousse cake for dessert. It was very yummy. We made sure to get there early so we could make it to two movies which is exactly how the evening worked out.

Transformers was our first show of the evening. My favourite is Bumble Bee. He's awesome. As Cheruby put it, "It's the best possible movie that could be made about Transformers." Yep, it's definitely that. I enjoyed it because it was fun.

The second movie was Stardust. I was very pleased. I read the book a couple years ago and while there was likely some discrepancies, I didn't notice. It was a really good. Cheruby really liked it too and he hasn't read the book. It will be a good movie for my collection.

Tonight, we had supper at Amigos in honour of Lando*'s 30th birthday. And like a lot of other people I know, the 30th year of her life was pretty frakin' great. Part of that great year was getting engaged to this guy who is the brother of this girl who is one of Babyface's wife's best friends. (I really liked writing that.) Anyway, part of the family tradition of the brother and the girl above is to make a cake and decorate it with a picture in icing. This seems that it would take a lot of talent. It was the picture of a prairie dog with "DUN! DUN! DUN!" written on it. I didn't get it.

And now I do.

_______________________________________
*Cheruby's ex was given this nickname by Cheruby's sister. There's no story behind it. She just started calling her Lando one day.

I didn't actually spend any money yet, but I just agreed to have someone come in and replace my water heater and furnace, install an air conditioner, and convert my wood fireplace to a gas fireplace. And that's on top of the money I've already said I'd spend on getting eavetroughs. I have to tell my neighbour about all this work, just to be neighbourly.

I didn't work on Wednesday. It was one of those days where I just couldn't do the job. I tried for about 45 minutes, then I called my boss and asked if I could take a vacation day that day and started to cry while doing it. There is nothing to worry about - just a day to not have to be responsible for anything. I laid in bed for 6 hours and read a book. I would call it a stress day, but I think it was more of a de-stress day as my stresses have been significantly relieved lately. And I got to have supper with my mom.

And while Cheruby did not make the top 10 in his contest and we're understandably disappointed, it is still kind a fabulous feat to be in the top 10% of all the entries. I will be taking him out to celebrate this new feather in his cap this week.

So I told my staff today the bad news that we permanently lost two positions from the team. Apparently, that was a relief to them compared to what they were thinking for the past two days. Unbeknownst to me there have been some executives statements floating around about shuffling management in the coming months. The team thought someone was leaving - I was leaving. One of my staff was even praying that I wasn't leaving the team. On one hand, I felt bad for worrying them so. On the other hand, the fact that my leaving the team was the worst thing they could come up with was very flattering. I may have actually felt my head swell.

And in bigger news...

See full listing here. His is one of the top 10% (actually probably closer to 8 or 9 percent, but let's not get picky) of screenplays entered. I'm a little worried about the two screenplays by the same guy. I'd hate for him to take up two precious slots in the next round of judging for finalists. Nineteen of the screenplays on that list will be cut this time around. Please send him a note to tell him how awesome this is and wish him luck with the next round.

Although I hate it when I cry at work, it seemed to happen quite a bit today.

First thing that happened was my hearing at the appeal board. I was in the room for 8 minutes in front of 5 board members and the inspector that wrote me up. I didn't say a quarter of the things I meant to like about talking to my neighbour and him not believing me and the contractor losing my original request for a quote. Lots of monosyllabic words from me, unfortunately. Luckily, the inspector was forced to agree that the contractor situation in the city is very backed up and October 31 seemed realistic. Regardless of my lack of communicative abilities in the hearing, the evidence speaks for itself.

The next part of the ongoing eavestroughing saga is the 7 to 10 day wait until I get the board's decision because they aren't allowed to tell me in person. And after that, I will have until October 31 to get eavestroughing on the house and until I that time, I will be a little bit stressy about it. Very low grade stress, but there will be stress.

The other craptacular thing that happened today was work related. Nothing I can do about it and nothing to be done about it. I just have to suck it up and present a good face and move on. I'm still going to be really pissed off about it for a very long time though. I was very upset and my boss let me go early. That's how craptacular it was.

I now have some baking to do for the United Way BBQ tomorrow.

Some of the wonderful things that may or may not be mentioned in yesterday's ginormous post are:

1. As we were waiting for the boys and the trailer for camping last week, we were driving around the back roads. We saw a mother deer and her fawn. The fawn was already quite big, but still had its spots. It also didn't have the sense to jump straight into the forest so it ran down the road in front of us. It then stopped and regarded us in the car for a while. I didn't get out my camera in time, but it was magical just the same. The fawn decided again that we were danger and leapt and bounded down the road again and into the forest. It was awesome.
2. Cheruby's screenplay getting into the quarter finals of one of the contests he's entered. I am so very proud of him. I really think his screenplay is very good and he is very talented. I wouldn't be surprised in the least if his screenplay won the whole competition.
3. My niece and nephew are fine young people that I like very much. My nephew is very brave and is trying very much to be like his dad. My niece is wild and has a lot of energy that is amazing to watch and be with.
   
4. G&D told Cheruby that they're gong to have a baby! She's already four months along. If I'm ever going to learn to knit, now's the time!
5. Someone very close to Cheruby got engaged! I am so thrilled for the happy couple.
6. My wonderful dad made me DVD copies of the first season of Hex. I'm very excited to watch it and very happy that my dad made it for me.
7. Last night the dumb bunny flew down the stairs when she thought she was in trouble for being on the counter (and she was.) She was over half way down the stairs and still 2 feet above them. I just about peed myself laughing.

There were other noteworthy moments, but I'm not remembering them right now. I'll note them later if I remember.

Okay, so I keep getting told to update my blog. Well, fine. Apparently 3 weeks is too long in between posts. Unfortunately, I agree with him.

So, let's see where was I...

It seems I last posted the day before Cheruby returned from his family reunion trip to Atlanta, Michigan. So let me tell you about his return because I know you all want to know. Heh.

Cheruby's Auntie K has two wonderful dogs, Julie and Sonny. Sonny looks like a teddy bear - it's really amazing how much he looks a teddy bear. Sooo cute! On the trip, Cheruby had told many stories and impressed upon her and his dad about my fat cat who has a protective (mean) streak regarding dogs who are much bigger than him in his house. Seems reasonable to me. But since Auntie K's dogs are so nice, she thought that it would be impossible for any cat to hold a grudge since they don't react to cats. So she had Sonny on a very short leash many feet away from the unhappy fat cat. I was willing to let it happen, but then Seraphy (Cheruby's dad) let the other dog out of the basement and he was roaming free. Oops. With much yelling and almost freaking out, Auntie K and I watched the unhappy situation unfold - her trapped holding the other dog and me trapped under my laptop and camera on the couch. The fat cat felt trapped as he tried to leave the room one way - dog in the way. Then he decided he'd leave the room the other way - dog in the way. Trapped in a room with a dog with a dog in both exits, he became AggressOR, the Fat One. He apparently tried to bite during his three flying sideways claw attacks at the dog who came away with a nick in her ear and a scratch down her back. Cheruby's dainty cat was scared and ran and dumb bunny got out of dodge too, but the Fat One had to be forcibly removed from the dog. Sticking one's hand into a frenzied cat's targeting range is, while dangerous, the only way to save the dog. I ended up with two bites (three deep tooth punctures) in the arm just above the wrist. And Cheruby and I spent his first night back in town in the emergency room and got to be known by the spacey intern as "The Cat Bite Lady." I would have preferred to spend the evening with Cheruby and his family, but that was not in the cards. In some sort of karmic balance, Auntie K found some glass in my basement by slicing her toe open on it. I don't remember any glass breaking in my basement ever so my guilt over that and her guilt over my arm (that wasn't her fault) kind of balance each other out. We tried to watch a movie later, Se7en, but I didn't make it through.

We missed a friend's birthday party that night, and I felt bad about that. We saw her later though and I remembered to tell her happy birthday.

I was supposed to spend some time with AJ that night as well. Instead, he got quite a show with the Fat One attacking the dog which he LOVED! You should ask him about it as he gets quite excited.

Only 21 days to go! Aren't you happy Rilla and Bne bugged me for an update?

I've had 4 heating companies come to the house to give me quotes on a new furnace, water heater, air conditioner, and converting my wood fireplace to a gas burning fireplace. Doesn't that sound like fun? It's so interesting how different companies give such a variety of services. One spent 15 minutes in my house and had me a quote the next day. One spent 45 minutes in my house and expected me to sign the quote for the work before he left. One spent 30 minutes here and mailed me my quote so I got it two weeks later. And one spent an hour here, has given me three follow up phone calls, followed up with my chimney sweep, has come back for a follow up visit for a half hour with a colleague, and would like Cheruby and I to come in to review the fireplace we would be getting before signing the quote. I'm expecting that last quote to be a significant amount higher than the others, but with the amount of care and attention they've taken to assess the work before they quote it, it might be worth it if I have the money. [sigh]

Speaking of money, I've had several visits to the bank and they might give me enough money to put eaves troughs on the house and replace all these appliances. Actually, that's not true, I will have enough money once I get my rebates from SaskEnergy. Good old SaskEnergy. I will have very happy new bits in my house that will make it worth more if I want to sell it. And it's already almost doubled in value since I bought it. YAY!

To make up for missing supper with AJ, we went out the next night to a little place over on 33rd St when Saigon Rose was closed. It was alright. I think I'd probably like a different dish better, but AJ really loved it. I was happy to spend the time with AJ because it seems altogether too little lately. I should probably take a little blame for that because I like to spend time at home with Cheruby.

The next night, we didn't get anyone over for movie night. Shockingly, there wasn't a lot of interest in Yankee Doodle Dandy. But that meant that we were able to go to Ril's impromptu 30th birthday party. There was ice cream cake, good friends, and some Guitar Hero. Good times.

Okay, so for those keeping track, I up to the July 27th weekend now. Friday, Kaz and Ril dropped off their new kittens for catsitting for the weekend. I was ecstatic when they said we could take them.

G&D came over on Friday night to finally watch Yankee Doodle Dandy with us. We were all equally horrified by it. Cheruby just quit singing "Over There!" I'm hoping he doesn't read this and remember to sing it again.

That Saturday was spent with my sweetie swimming and lounging in the afternoon and Sunday was spent playing Scrabble with Drang and Soc Chick instead of playing Low Life. We returned home to have the kittens stolen from under our noses. I was sad because I didn't get to see goodbye. I also wanted to give them their meat but I probably would've forgotten anyway.

Can you believe it? We're already to Monday, July 30th in my life. Heh. Suffer the excruciating details fiendish fellows who cry for an update!

I went bicycling with my friend from work and then Cheruby and I went swimming at his mom's house with Kaz and Ril. And then there was D&D on the Tuesday night before I spent my Wednesday night driving to Calgary. That started the many nights in a row of 5 hours of sleep.

I got to Calgary before midnight which I was pleased with. I still stayed up and visited with Ferlak for a couple hours before sleeping as he was leaving in the morning for a rave. Yes, that's the right Ferlak.

Work the next day was fun and I got a nice nap after work before spending a delightful evening with good friends in Calgary. We got to watch Tall One's new movie, Hot Fuzz. I have to say that with the proper introduction, this movie is completely awesome. I was told it was violent and funny, but not as gorey as a similar movie which I enjoyed except for the gore, Shaun of the Dead. Hmmm... same actor. I got home from that delightful evening to spend the rest of night until 2am with Bne. It was good to spend time with Bne even though I forgot to bring the Fourth Season of Six Feet Under.

Friday was awesome after work as I spent it with my brother and his family. Pizza for supper and watching Ghost Rider. And talking to my drunken Cheruby for over an hour was pretty awesome although it lead to the next night of 5 hours of sleep. I slept on the couch so the kids woke me up pretty early. We got them packed and were on the road by about 10:30am. I was trying to make it to Saskatoon by 6pm. We were there by just after 5 which I was impressed by as we stopped five times - once for lunch, once for gas, and three times to have the kids run around the car. They were very good and were very good for the entire time they were here. I was very, very, very pleased with my 6 year old nephew and 9 year old niece.

The first thing we did once in Saskatoon was have burgers, go to the park, get all cleaned up with showers, play a few video games, and watch a movie before bed. Sunday was even more action packed with shoe shopping to let Cheruby sleep in because I don't need more than 5 hours sleep, swimming at Cheruby's mom's, and then mom and dad got to Saskatoon. Supper at Fuddruckers and then some mini-golf left us all very tired.

Monday we had great plans, but nothing got done except for a shopping trip to Wal-Mart and a fabulous $4 pair of pants that I feel guilty about owning because of where I bought them. Evil, evil, evil and yet I succumbed to the temptation that is the low, low prices of Wal-Mart. There were a lot of video games played because grandpa said it was okay. [sigh] And after my parents took off with the kids to Nipawin (including a brief but very exciting trip to the Smuts corner for Cheruby and myself to rescue mom, dad and the kids from their unhappy car [we passed 4 other unhappy cars in the 44 kilometres to theirs,]) we enjoyed a nice quiet evening of Tetris and the Gilmore Girls.

Tuesday was supposed to be In Nomine at our house, but Cheruby forgot about AJs horrible reaction to onions and so we played at his new house instead. Despite the lack of countertop space and itty bitty bathroom, it's nice and cozy with a nice big yard that the neighbour takes care of.

We moved movie night to Wednesday last week to accommodate our camping trip to Tobin Lake, isolated Wall's Flats to be exact. Cheruby was suitably impressed by the scenic drive out there and all the lack of other people and being surrounded by wilderness. I was so happy when I saw the beauty and the memory of it came flooding back because I knew that Cheruby would be loving it even more than I was. Mom and I drove out with the kids and Cheruby went with dad to pick up the trailer. We waited and waited and waited and drove back to my aunt's house to use the phone to see when the trailer had left and went back to the campsite and there they were. I have a great picture of the directions carved in the road for us because they thought WE were lost.

First night there included hot dogs (two of which escaped digestion by diving into the fire) and smores. Mmmmm... Smores. They were awesome. Friday morning was an early morning swim for mom, my niece and I. It was so lovely and wonderful and quite chilly. I only stayed in for about a half hour. I still haven't gotten over my dislike of seaweed around my legs and not being able to see the bottom. Although the lake was so clear that even though I was into up to my chest, I could still see the bottom. I loved it. Mom was crazy and went swimming into the deeper water to some driftwood sticking up from the bottom. I know that it couldn't be that deep if there are logs sticking out of the top of the water and stuck in the bottom, but I still can't see therefore I won't go. I have this silly fear of fish nibbling me or rubbing against my legs. Ewww...

I had a nice nap while Cheruby, the kids, and dad went for a boat ride to do some fishing. Then it started to rain a little. Then dad forgot his very pretty and expensive knife on the boat and when they went back for it - the boat people had found it and put his name on it for him. It made him very happy to not have lost it and to have honest people have found it. Of course, while mom and dad were gone to find the knife, my nephew fell while trying to get on one of the top bunks and really hurt his back. It was the only time I heard him cry for his mom the whole trip. I was very proud of him for being so strong. Then we played a game before mom started cooking steaks for supper.

We had more Smores for dessert before bed and got to sleep relatively early. All that fresh air must have tuckered us all out. Of course, Cheruby had to tell some scary stories to my niece which freaked me out more than they did her. [sigh] I just can't get the images out of my head. I did help make her scream though after Cheruby told the infamous hook-hand story. I really don't like scary stories.

We were off to an early start as the wind and rain were having a really big party the next morning. It meant that we were able to get back to Nipawin to find that we were locked out of the house because my parents have changed the lock since the last time they made me a key. Oops. So we had breakfast at A&W and drove around town a bit and pointed out the historical sites to Cheruby and the kids. After we finally got into the house, we discovered that mom and dad just weren't feeling up to driving to the city again.

Cheruby, in this short time span, got some FABULOUS news. He's a quarter finalist in one of the screenplay contests he entered. He was grinning like a fool and offered to drive the kids in his car while I took some alone time driving my car back to the city. He did very well in putting on Peter and the Wolf for the kids as it put them right to sleep. They knew that their mom and dad were waiting for them at my house in Saskatoon. It was awesome to see them all lovey and huggy and happy.

We went swimming right away and this is where my niece's unfortunate wound from vacation came from. She got stung by a wasp. The poor girl, I felt so bad for her. I gave her very encourage words, but it was still her that was strong. We waited for the stinging to go down and the wasps in the yard to disperse a little before jumping into the pool. I had to rid the pool of three wasps while we played, but it was still really awesome to see my brother play with his kids in the pool. I loved it even though I got dunked and I really suck at getting dunked because I always breathe wrong.

Another evening out at Fuddruckers, but no mini-golf that night even though the kids tried to persuade us. We just headed back to my house where they played video games and Cheruby and I headed out to the Mage game we thought we'd have to miss because of camping. I was a little disappointed in the game because something really big that was supposed to happen got kiboshed by some of the other players. Poopy business really, but it made me feel better about being so late.

We hung out with the kids and my family in the morning and found some things they were missing that were likely still in Nipawin, but mostly everything was recovered. I sure did enjoy having them here. I was so scared about it and forgot that my niece is a really good kid and so is my nephew. I loved having them here and can't wait until next year to do it again.

Having company leave early enough on Sunday gave us the rest of the day to relax and recuperate from all the excitement. Oh and pig out on floats and chips and pizza and all that other bad stuff and make ourselves sick before we started being good again on Monday (I was only mildly good on Monday and today while Cheruby has been a saint.) We watched so many episodes of Gilmore Girls that Cheruby was running them all together in his head. Then we watched some more last night again. I love them. And just when Cheruby was overdosing on GG and I was counting the remaining episodes, I brought out the Third Season which made my angel laugh and laugh. I was pleased with myself.

Tonight was another fighty night in D&D and time spent doing our magey downtime stuff with Kaz and Ril. Another good night. I've been stressing about my hearing tomorrow a little today and my shoulders are aching and I'm grinding my teeth. I'm hoping everything goes well tomorrow and I really hope I don't break down crying in front of the appeal board for my eavestroughing situation. I am looking forward to being done with it though. I'll have to wait a few days for their decision about the $10,000 fine but I have every reason to be confident that I won't be fined.

I haven't been able to do any creative writing which I'm okay with given the scope of everything else I've been doing lately. None of which is work-related, but work is really stressing me out so I don't really want to talk about it anyway.

Before Cheruby went away, I bought him a present - The Writer's Toolbox. It has some gidgets and gadgets to help writers come up with things to write about. As we were exploring his new toy, he told me that he wanted to read more of my writing. That's a bit intimidating, but I'm game. It was the first thing I wanted to be when I grew up - a writer.

I was a voracious reader as a child. I used to sit hunched over with my night light shining over my shoulder onto the page when I was supposed to be sleeping. I made a fort in the bottom of my closet so that I didn't have to hunch in front of the night light anymore. I only got caught a few times, but certainly not enough to discourage me from doing it. Sometimes, I'd even go back to it the same night just after I'd been caught and told to go to sleep.

Those two ideas, writing and reading, come in a package for me. It was from my love of reading (which I still have, I just have a lot of other obligations that keep from doing just what I want - stupid needing to live and have money and be clean) that came my desire to be a writer. Then I tried it once in grade 7 and wasn't very good at it so I didn't really bother trying again after that. There are a lot of things that come easy to me on the first try and when something came along that I didn't easily pick up, I just chose to go another direction - like bowling. Bowling reasonably well is way easier than writing reasonably well.

In my foray into writing a story for my sweetheart, I realized that once I'd envisioned the ending, which I always thought was my "hard part," I was done writing the story in my head and the effort to get that down on paper, reasonably well, wasn't worth the end product for me. No one would be able to definitively tell me that I'd done a good job. I needed that a lot as a kid. Good marks meant I'd done a good job. A high score in bowling meant I'd done a good job. Someone could read my story and really like it, but someone else might think it was kind of lame. No real way to tell whether my efforts were good or not.

So, I'm going to do my best to finish my story. And read it and edit it and make it pretty and make it into something of which I can be proud. (And with that I'm reminded of the line from Alien: Resurrection, "...I am not the man with whom to fuck.")

I had high hopes for getting stuff done today. It's 3:45 and I have a clean tub, but not a clean bathroom. I have made a few Scrabble moves on Facebook. I've watched the end of The Hunt for Red October which I've come to really love after first thinking I would hate it. I started catching up on some blog reading. And now I have a sleeping cat on my chest as I blog.

I missed farmers' market, but I still have time to finish cleaning the bathroom. Tonight, I have some process writing planned for work. What could be more fun? I'll probably stick in some Lord of the Rings to keep me company.

The one thing that I love about the heat is the sleeping cats. They are so hot they don't want to move just as we humans get, but they can actually sleep. And they look dead on the carpet, other than the breathing.

So, here's an effort to get something else done today, I'm going to go get some magazine racks for Cheruby's music. I'm hoping to colour him impressed when he gets home.

There are tons of shows on television that tell us what beauty is and I'm not even going to talk about commercials. The show on right now is Plastic Makes Perfect and this particular episode is having a teenager getting a nose job. She's already a model and her parents are going along with this and even paying for it. Is it a good idea? Will it give her short term happiness that will translate into long term happiness? Just because someone doesn't have to learn to love themselves in spite of perceived defects and they have the money to fix those defects, is it really a bad thing?

Probably.

What I love about me is me. I am who I am, but I've had some rough times with liking myself because of my weight. The biggest thing that bothers me about it now is the unhealthiness of it.

I guess the thing that breaks my heart is that it takes so long for some people to learn that. I'm so scared for my niece because I don't want her to have to have that pain. The pain for me was part of what made me humble. If I hadn't gone through that, I don't know if I would be where I am today.

Everyone is different and learns differently. Maybe pain isn't necessary to learn, but maybe it is.

So if I reach my goals, I can increase that to 94 which I like better.

Well, I did it. I finally got up the nerve yesterday to talk to my neighbour. Apparently crying in front of his wife on Wednesday morning had an impact, because he wasn't angry when we started talking like I figured he would be until I gave him the letter I got from my contractor and he had to face the fact that I wasn't lying. He was nice enough and not being angry at all that I started to cry about 2 or 3 sentences into what I was trying to say. I gave him the letter and Cheruby's and my names and our phone number in case there was anything else he wanted to talk about.

He told me he didn't want to be a bitchy neighbour either which I had thought. This incident just coloured that a little. In the winter, he shoveled the sidewalk in front of the house and this spring, he put some stuff on my cedars for me. Yesterday, he mowed the part of the lawn next to the street which is impossible to get with the push mower. That's what gave me the nerve - he just did something nice for us.

Every time during this thing that I started to get upset with him, I had to remind myself that he was a nice guy and think of all the things he's done for me. (Oh yeah, he pushed my car out of a snow bank last year, too.) And remind myself of his point of view and I always felt bad for the state of his basement. It was definitely the exception when I was calling him names and Cheruby can attest to that. He got into trouble for dissing the guy a few times. Of course, that was at the whim of my moods too.

After talking to him last night, I came back into the house and let the apparently enormous amount of stress I'd been carrying around out through the usual way. (Tears, you pervs!) And then I finally got a full night's rest last night.

And today, I'm not scared to spend time in the backyard (that was a surprise to me when I realized it) and in fact am feeling inspired to do just that.

So, after my last update on my house, things have gotten a little crazier.

I finally got my estimate from the roofing people for eavestroughing on July 3. I phoned initially on April 27. That's how backed up everything is. I likely won't get eavestroughing until September or October though. It's really, really awful. I guess that's not the true awful part - that would be the registered letter I got from the City yesterday just after I got the quote for the work. It says I have to have eavestroughing on the house by July 27 or I'm going to get fined $10,000. I do get to appeal, but if that doesn't go through, I'm kind of screwed. I'm so worried about my appeal getting lost in the mail. You know, one of those things where nothing goes according to the way it normally works. I think I might send it Express Post or registered just so that I can track it.

On the other hand, I was just looking over some notes to ensure I'd done all the to do items and I saw that I had written down something cool that happened on our camping trip a few weeks ago. Cheruby and I were sitting at the picnic table and our first thought at a new sound was, "That's one HUGE mosquito!" Then we both instantly were looking around to catch a glimpse of what had to be a hummingbird, not a mosquito. It hovered just a few feet from us and let us have a good look. It was a wonderful, brief moment on our trip worth remembering.

In celebrations this weekend, we did some pretty cool stuff.

Friday after work, Cheruby and I stuck around for a while and slowly packed up to go to Lumsden for International White Trash Week. I thought I was being wimpy when I went to bed, but then I saw that it was 4 in the morning. Of course, at that time Jill was still pouring very strong spice-ed rum and cokes for a few of her guests.

We woke well after the crack of noon the next day to go gaming much later than Cheruby wanted. He went to Games Day with Jill while Ril, Kaz and I made up werewolf characters for the vampire LARP that night. We played a pack of Get of Fenris who were grumpy with the leech-ridden city. They were being contained by the Wendigo but were getting pretty uppity so we went in to show them how powerful we were and that they should stop rattling their cage. We all made it out alive too which was great. We took down five of them including the prince and sheriff. Not quite what we expected, but it worked out well for us. I did feel a little bad about killing off PCs, but Jill gave us cart-blanche for our actions. If they were stupid, we got to act accordingly. We really were looking for a fight, but we got one sooner than we thought.

To finish off our fabulous evening, we went back to the loft for more International White Trash Week celebrations. I was mixing the strong drinks this time. Gin and juice was very yummy. Ril thought so too. Heh.

Sleeping made it impossible to make it back in time for Low Life this afternoon with Drang and family, but we did get to have barbecued hot dogs for Canada Day which was yummy.

We're off to Cheruby's mom's for supper shortly and then tomorrow is more hanging out with Kaz and Ril maybe. And a friend of Cheruby's from Vancouver. Another busy, fun weekend.

Oh, and happy birthday to His Nibs. That was another fabulous reason to celebrate this weekend.

I love my house. It's a great house. Needs a little love here and there, but it's a great house.

Unfortunately, it needs a little more tender loving cash than usual. Apparently, the chimneys aren't so usable right now. And really haven't been since I bought the house. Nothing to be done now except get it fixed. So, a little trip to my bank and some internet investigations later and it may not be as bad as I originally thought.

Things to have other people do to my house:
~ replace the furnace
~ replace the fireplace
(or replace the chimneys)
~ get eavestroughs
~ replace the front step
~ possibly paint or replace the siding on the house

I'm sure my SaskEnergy house inspections will lengthen that current list, but that's a short wait for a week and a half and possibly some furnace shopping later.

My car is finally dying too, but I'm going to see how long it'll last while I really drive it into the ground. We'll just let SKYBOY live the rest of its days to the fullest without being hooked up to diagnostic machines and in surgery.

I like the word gallivanting. It makes me happier than traveling for work makes me. Don't get me wrong, I love a good trip (business or otherwise), but being away from home for the majority of three weeks is a bit much. And thus, I am happy to be home.

Some notable things that I encountered while away were
~ getting caught up on sleep
~ having a mediocre steak at a upscale steakhouse and then stealing the napkin
~ hearing about a colleague getting his nipples pierced
~ reading Cheruby's screenplay
~ learning about a new product offering at work and being brought in at the ground level
~ getting a new title and job level at work without having to take on extra responsibilities
~ losing sleep
~ running on caffiene
~ getting to meet some of my new staff for the first time
~ coming home

I don't even remember the weekend I was at home in between trips. Wait! I do remember something - spending time with AJ. That was particularly awesome. He helped me surprise Cheruby by bringing by his birthday presents while Cheruby was picking me up at the airport on Friday night. Thanks!

I opened my heart and a little girl ran out
She laughed and giggled, daring me to catch her
Dancing and spinning with a daisy in her hands
She knew I wouldn't be able to play with her long

As my thoughts drifted from the joy of being with her
And the fear of losing her started to creep in
She knew she had to return
To my heart to wait for me to let her out again

Not very poetic, but it was beautiful to me to see her playing with such pure happiness and love. She had long, dark curly hair that looked almost wild. I don't remember whether there were small flowers in her hair, but they wouldn't have been out of place. Her simple white dress was playful in the tiny details and helped show her innocence. I don't think she ever stops smiling, even when she is closed up in my heart for the wrong reasons.

June 5, 2003 3:12 PM

Notice: Porcupines are eating your hair!

Recent studies have proved that hair loss is not due to genetics at all. Instead, dream clinics showed video footage that shows rat-sized porcupines gnawing on the hair of sleeping people. Normally that wouldn't be a problem because the hair would grow back, but these particular creatures have a chemical they secrete via their claws that inhibits hair growth. Scientists are advising everyone to get stuffed octopus as these seem to be the only thing these small rodents are afraid of.

June 12, 2003 4:26 PM

Imprinting tentacle motifs on metal with a toothbrush is hard work.

Yesturday, octopus fans worldwide were fully supportive of Weetbra of Southern Saskatchewan when he set out to break the record of smallest octopus etching ever. in order to accomplish this grandiose feat he made use of toothbrush bristles! His canvas? Aluminum of course! Being watched by a team of observors for the last nine years, his efforts finally came to a halt today with great fanfare. When asked why he did it he responded that all his life he was in awe of the stupidity of people who were devoted to idiotic things, and he had to show them all what true devotion to a worthwhile cause was. I think we can all agree that he has proved his point. Amazing man. I really think he is going to be awarded a Noble Prize this year - if there is any justice in the world.

There are a few things I've been meaning to mention.

1. Thank you, Owen, for introducing me to papadums. The healthy equivalent to chips.

2. I can't remember anymore. All the bits of my brain have fallen out somewhere along the way this week.

I leave again on Tuesday night for Toronto this time. I will get to have supper with some of my staff and be enjoying every moment of it. I'll be around another time this summer as well and actually make a trip out there specifically to go check in on them. It'll be good and I'll be driving in Toronto. No problem, right?

It's Cheruby's birthday next weekend. I'm totally looking forward to going camping with him and his dad and uncle.

Oh, I remember!

2. Thank you to Furlak for Blue Moon City that finally found its way to me through Bne's emotional mom.

3. Thanks to my brother for the First Season of Fraggle Rock. It's AWESOME!!

Congratulations to Cheruby for finishing his screenplay and submitting it to people to review and possible get money. He did that today. If you see him around, tell him that he done good. He spent some time screaming into pillows today.

This weekend, there's company in from Edmonton although not the usual large crowd what with it being the Father's Day weekend. Slarpcon is missing out.

Let's start with the fact that I loved the homemade red wine, a French Merlot. I didn't try the white.

The first course was the roast suckling pig on a bed of jellyfish. Never had jellyfish? Well, let me save you the trouble. Chewy, rubbery and crunchy all at the same time with very little actual flavour except the sesame oil in which it was cooked. The skin of the pig was very crunchy.

Course two was my favourite of the evening if you don't include the sweets. It was a birdsnest made from deep fried grated potatoes bits on a bed of lettuce with lemon slices and marishino cherries for garnish. Inside the birdsnest was scallops, shrimp, squid with mixed vegetables of carrots, celery, snow peas, and mushrooms. I didn't have the shrimp or the squid, but the scallops were yummy as were the veggies I ate which excluded the mushrooms. There was some sort of sauce of course, but I can't really describe the taste.

Shrimp balls with crab claws came next. The crab claw was good, but I didn't care for the texture of the shrimp ball. It was about as big as a squished baseball. I think there were either noodles or coconut bits deep fried on the outside of the ball.

The fourth course was the shark fin soup. It had crab meat and shark fin in it, but tasted mostly like the sauce on the birdsnest.

Somewhere in those first four courses, cognac was served and we discussed how much our friend, the bride, looked like Lucy Lui.

Next came the fried crispy noodles with chopped up lobster bits with cream sauce on top. I had a lobster claw and some noodles. Not being a big fan of lobster, it was okay, but others were loving it. The lobsters' beady eyes were looking at me funny.

I will be trying to forget course six for a long time. There was a gelatinous, bland seafood of some sort which we learned later on was sea cucumber. Very large mushroom caps and sliced mushroom caps that looked like meat slices were the other main parts of the dish. Thank goodness for the delicious baby bok choy in this dish otherwise I'm not sure I would have made it through. Well, that and the whole glass of wine I downed with this dish.

It was about now in the evening that the head table guests at the wedding came around to every table to thank us for coming. Lucy Lui had changed a course or so before this into her red dress from her white dress. I had some time to let my tummy settle after those mushrooms. Bleargh.

The seventh course was an almost whole (no head or feet) roasted chicken chopped up into bits. I had some breast. There were a few people at the table who'd had very little to eat to this point. There were also some tasty styrofoam chips that were white and pink that came with the chicken. I have no idea what they really were and I'm pretty sure I don't want to know.

A whole pickerel was next on the chopping block. It's beady eyes were also staring at me and were definitely worse than the lobster beady eyes. Funny, rolly-poll fish heads just occurred to me now. Anyway, the fish was alright, just seemed to greasy to be good.

Course nine was seafood fried rice with shrimp and scallop bits. Familiar and therefore a favourite at the table as well.

The tenth course was the final real food course before dessert. Noodles with small mushrooms slices. This dish tasted like sesame too.

Next came cookies which were very sweet. Well, one was very sweet and yummy and the other was covered in sesame seeds and was a bit cake-like and less sweet.

Lastly, cake was our twelfth course. It wasn't the real wedding cake as there wasn't enough to go around, but the CostCo slab cake was treat enough after the evening of uncertain food adventures. The real wedding cake would have been far better. Three layers with the top layer being marble chocolate and vanilla cake with chocolate filling, middle layer being chocolate cake with vanilla filling and bottom layer being vanilla cake with raspberry filling.

Other highlights of the evening were applause at the bride's eyebrows being waxed (she's really not a girly-girl) and the blind-folded groom going after the garter with chopsticks.

Thanks for being such a great date, neuba.

The next three weeks are booked. This Wednesday, I'm going to Edmonton and working from our office there for a few days. Then on Saturday, I get to go to a traditional Chinese wedding with Neuba and I'm very excited. I come home on Sunday, just so that I can leave again on Tuesday night to go to Winnipeg for work for Wednesday and Thursday. Then I get a whole 5 days at home before going to Toronto the next Tuesday night until Friday which was supposed to be a vacation day. Phew! I'm tired just reading all that.

Of course, all this travel is because I'm going to be working on an exciting project at work. I'm a little nervous because I haven't worked on a project like this before and I have other stuff on the go that's just as important, but not as high profile. I'm looking forward to the challenge.

The weekend after I return from Toronto, Cheruby and I are going camping and then the weekend after that is the July long weekend. And then I think life is a little more settled in July, but it might not be by the time I get there. Except that I have plans and an appointment to see a psychic on July 12th with Ril and cenobyte.

All these plans, or the vast majority, got planned today. And I also solidified my vacation plans for August where I'm going to go pick up my niece and nephew from Calgary on the long weekend, then have my mom and dad come get them from Saskatoon. Then have my brother and sister-in-law come get them the next weekend where they will possibly come camping with us or just join us or something. Anyway, the dates for those plans were confirmed today too.

And I'm already dreaming of going to San Francisco this fall.

We went over to Cheruby's mom's this afternoon because she has a pool and it was hot and I like swimming. We also ate her food. Life is good. My busy schedule today is:

• swimming while the sun is out


• nap


• attend Rilla, Em, and Deb's smashing party

Sometimes, it's hard to imagine things being better. But then, I get all needy and want all my cool friends to live close by and none of us ever have to work, we can all just hang out, play games, nap, sleep in, and eat nachoes. Then our hobbies would rule our lives. How cool would that be?

Honestly, I get a certain amount of self esteem from being paid to do a job so that probably wouldn't be ideal for me. Unless, of course, I could constantly being doing nice things for other people who said, "Thanks, you're awesome," a lot. Then I might be able to dig it long term. Or maybe, I could travel like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and join the United Nations. Maybe that would be good to do, but then I'd miss out on the constant party my friends were having. That would never do. Maybe I could just convince them all to come with me and then we'd do a lot more good and make a bigger difference.

And maybe, just knowing my friends are happy is good enough. Yeah, that's enough. Well, that and naps.

Apparently, it takes almost 2 hours to flip through over 800 tarot decks. I was inspired by AJ's recent reading for Ril as well as a conversation I was having with her. I told her that I wasn't sure if I wanted a tarot deck. Maybe I'm reluctant because I don't want to tempt myself in believing in it too much. They are a guidance tool, a way to help you look at a situation differently. I don't want it to be true. Cheruby's first reading for me was about us and I didn't like what it had to say - everything long term was icky. I haven't wanted anything to do with them since then. I couldn't think of way to interpret the cards that wasn't bad.

Cheruby and I were in Witch's Brew last weekend where we perused the tarot. I picked up a few decks and then pointed to one and said, "That one." I knew it immediately from my last review of tarot decks from the website in March, but there were WAY less decks then. It certainly didn't take me 2 hours to review them and discuss the options with Cheruby.

In this last review, I had to set my criteria of what I would and wouldn't like so that it was easier to identify. I don't like ones that use non-traditional names for the cards. That cuts out a lot of them. Oddly enough, I don't like ones with animals as the main characters. I don't like ones where the cards have named characters like the Legend: Arthurian Tarot deck. That one would have made it except for the naming thing. It bugged me too much. And there was one erotic deck that I quite liked as well.

Having said all that, I will never buy a tarot deck for myself. The superstition exists that a tarot deck should be bought for you by someone else. And yes, it is just that, a superstition. However, if I'm going to have a tarot deck, I might as well follow the superstitions. Maybe I'd like one afterall. All the ones I like are on My Wish List.

I'm a little crazy sometimes, and I figure, how can that be boring? And yet, I think I'm pretty boring right now. Nothing really going on of note in my life that would spark a conversation.

How's the whole live-in situation? Really great. I still want to spend most of my time with him.

Doing anything besides hanging out with the stable boy? Not really. I mean, there's the games - Mage, In Nomine, D&D, and Low Life, but not a whole lot else. Haven't been to many movies lately. Spending time with friends as usual, but I won't talk about that. I mean, I wouldn't want to be considered a gossip or anything. ;)

Working on any projects? Tons of stuff at work that I'm feeling pretty good about but that's boring as hell to talk about. Well, I should be doing all kinds of stuff around the house, but I'd rather spend time hanging out with the stable boy. I've been playing too much Text Twist this week too.

I got to be a book geek on the weekend and spend my $30 that I got for my birthday and the bookstore. And then there was the $100 award I got at work for being so cool. I spent that on books too. I officially spent about $90 on books last weekend and ordered one that I should get this weekend. It's pretty awesome to spend that much money on books. My bag from the bookstore broke from the weight of it all. Heh.

The Little One got attacked by one of the other cats and got a couple wounds where her fur had been pulled out along with some skin. She's healing okay, but they're at the perfect spot on the back of her neck to scratch.

In an effort to be less boring, I will be hanging out with more friends in person, not just Cheruby and reading something. My Post Secret books are great, but they are really personal and I don't know that I want to talk about them. I like to have the secrets to myself and what kind of life those people really live.

Oh, and welcome, to the blogging world, AJ!

Link: The Greek Mythology Personality Test written by Aleph_Nine on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

The best part about catching up with friends you haven't seen in a long time is that you get to give an overview of the best things in your life. And I got reminded over and over again how freaking good I've got things right now. I mean, I get to genuinely say that I love my job. I am on my way to owning my home. I have this fantastic guy who takes care of me and makes me laugh and smile and cry with joy. We have three cats who provide endless entertainment and love.

I got to see the couple from down under and the couple from Los Gatos. And I got a picture of the sisters and hungry folks who like dry ribs.

I think this was the first time I'd heard Cheruby play just by himself. And I could hear HIM in the music and it was so beautiful that I was crying every time. I know I'm a suck and I love every moment of feeling as much as I do because life wouldn't be as good otherwise.

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Cheruby started out my birthday on the drive home after Mage by asking me over and over again what time it was - just looking for midnight. Well, I noticed that the Shoppers Drugmart was closed. I had to tell him it was after midnight and thusly he sang to me in the car through my protestations that I wasn't born until 1:15 in the afternoon on May 13th.

He really wanted me to have my birthday present after we were in the house so I finally agreed. I "unwrapped" it by taking it out from its hiding place - Gilmore Girls Season 1. Way to go Cheruby! He's awesome.

We watched the first episode last night and I cried, of course. I'm such a suck and I love it.

All the caffeine I had at the game last night meant I didn't sleep until after 4 a.m. and then got up at 9:30 when my wonderful mother phoned to wish me a happy birthday. I didn't get out of bed in time to answer the phone so she sang happy birthday to my answering machine. And then Owen called and sang to me again. It's been a good day. Jeremy's mom came over for breakfast wich was a little late because I didn't get at it early enough. C'est la vie.

And I get to see my mom tonight too. How wonderful is that?

It’s 2:30 in the morning the night before my brother’s wedding. His fiancé and my niece are staying at a hotel tonight so the only people in the house are my parents, Cheruby, myself, my nephew, and my brother. The first five people on that list have been in bed since about 10 which means my brother just got home.

I don’t remember the last time I laughed that hard. My brother’s friends kindly broke into the house through the front window as the house keys were with his clothes at the best man’s house. Thoughts should now be wandering to the various ideas of what my brother was wearing.

Spandex biking shorts was the most decent thing he had on.

My brother is six feet tall and weighs 250 pounds. He’s a big man. He played football with all these friends that kindly dropped him off.

The first thing I recognized in my sleepiness and in the darkness of downstairs was a slight twirling in his “shirt.” That’s not right. Then he moved into the porch light. Lace? Scoop neck? Oh my goodness! I will never forget the sight of my brother standing in full light, defending his outfit mightily by saying, “SSSHHHHH,” very loudly at the end of statements like, “I put this on while I sober,” and “You saw nothinG!” Of course, my favourite will always be, “What? You don’t like this?” whilst rubbing his chest.

Then he tried to take the nice white lace dress off. There were a few ripping sounds from the kitchen as he was trying not to let me see him. I went to investigate and found him, defeated, with the dress still on. I giggled some more. Then I saw him try again which revealed more of what will stay with be to the end of my days – a red strapless bra. Around his waist.

The boys kept trying to break in the front window after my brother kept closing it. They were looking for the friend who’d actually made it through the window into the house. He’d given me a hug and asked me where my parents were. I was laughing too hard to think that telling him might be a bad idea. The boys at the window were threatening to leave him there. My brother’s friends from high school are a funny bunch and boy were they making me laugh. Wade, Rube, Shane. The best man was probably out there somewhere in the night too, but I didn’t get a chance to see him.

As I watched him undress the rest of the way in his room, I heard more ripping as he removed something from the lower half of his body that wasn’t the spandex. I must have missed something else – lacy underpants, perhaps. I wasn’t too concerned because I’d see enough to have me giggling so vociferously that Cheruby queried about whether someone had just poured 4 shots of alcohol down my throat as I came back to bed.

Just before he headed for bed, he came to the door of my room and threatened Cheruby and I.

And within minutes his stumbling into the house and laying his threats of never revealing what I’d just witnessed, I now hear him snoring more loudly than our father ever has. It’s going to be an early morning for him. Hopefully he’ll be too worried about his headache to worry too much about getting hitched.

Was one year ago today. I remember being completely bonkers. I didn't feel that any of my clothes were good enough for this first date. I dragged a co-worker shopping with me at lunch and I tried on many, many shirts. The last one I had in the change room was it - an orange T-shirt. And I looked so darn cute in it! It was my first thought when I saw myself in the mirror. Then I came out and my thoughts were echoed by the salesperson and my friend.

There are certain things I remember from that night. I remember losing badly at Lord of the Rings. I remember the grilled cheese sandwiches we had for supper. What else do you have at Lydia's that's reliably good? I remember the place being pretty much empty although I'm not sure how much of that was just me being wrapped up in our date. I remember having to let you pay so you could "feel like a big man." And I remember how I laughed at that. I remember holding hands on our walk along the river. I remember not feeling very self conscious and just thoroughly enjoying myself. I remember how messy your hair was. I remember trying to find that smile I saw in your picture. I remember a kiss on my hand goodnight although you really wanted to kiss my lips. I remember a hug too. I remember the story about why you walk the way you do. And I remembered that your best friend's name was Matt. I remember flapping and how it made me giggle. I probably filled Lydia's with my laughter that night. I remember driving in my car to park next to yours while we walked so we could walk back to our cars together later.

And I remember being so certain about you. Here we are, clowder and all.

Okay, here's the scoop. Work is crazy right now. We are usually a team of 7 managers and right now we are a team of 4. That's where my head is at right now. And if I wasn't trying to keep up with the rest of my life, it might be okay, but things are ever changing.

Cheruby is officially moving in. I'm very excited. It's wonderful to have him around. We've had some help from some friends in painting his office which is very nice. Friends are good to have.

Since getting home from Edmonton, I've been trying to catch up on sleep. This weekend wasn't great for that, but I got to do lots of cool stuff. Went shopping with my mom for my brother's wedding and played Mage and had a massage and went swimming and had supper with Kaz, Rilla and Cheruby. And that was just on Saturday. I forced myself to stay in bed on Sunday morning, but woke up a lot. Then we got to play Low Life on Sunday. Cheruby and I rode our bikes over to the Drangs' house. Then we went to a birthday party.

I don't really even remember last week although last night, I skipped everything and just slept. And tonight - Gilmore Girls!! YAY!

Where is the time going? I had wanted to do all kinds of things this weekend, but time does seem to be running short already.

I wish I had pictures of the craziness that was Friday night at the Pirate Party. I forgot my pirate shirt, but managed to remember my awesome head scarf. My memory also came through for Rilla as she got to wear the pirate costume I made for the Seven Seas LARP in Brandon a few years ago. Anyway, I like kissing. And my hands are sore from giving so many massages. I hate to admit it, but my back is still sore from the 1/2 hour I spent with the little Asian lady in the massage chair.

Lunch with Auntie Cool was particularly good. She means the world to me. We had a good chat where I got to tell her that she made me feel safe and comfortable and loved. It didn't always used to be that way, but now it is and I love it.

Ferlak was supposed to run a game for us this weekend but it didn't really work out that way. I have been very much looking forward to playing in a Ferlak game as he was the only one I was in games with for quite a long time before he moved away. Maybe next time. Maybe when Cheruby and I are in Calgary next month, we can spend an evening with Ferlak and the Very Tall One playing this game. It would be great!

Yesterday was bizarre. We were supposed to do this, that and the other thing, but ended up just going to Farmers' Market in Old Strathcona where I had some paska bread baked with poppy seeds inside which were so very yummy. I also got a poppyseed roll for a very good friend which he loving stroked at dinner and would get snarly at the mention of possibly sharing. Heh. A costume shop eluded us all afternoon and we came home to find that we were only a block and a half away at one point. Ah well, such is life. We did spend some time in a glorious store full of hats. There was one that I really wanted, but alas, couldn't part with the money. I still need a brown hat and possibly another black one. There was a red velvet fedora Trilby as well that I really, really wanted because it made me feel sexy.

After supper at Montana's with a bunch of folks, we went to a book store which was awesome. Rilla sat on the floor and read poetry. I bought the new Post Secrets book. Cheruby couldn't read it this morning because it was too upsetting in some parts. There are two other books that Ferlak has that got me hooked.

And yesterday, a friend was supposed to paint a room in my house. Specifically, a tree on the wall in Cheruby's office to help inspire him. I hope he likes it a lot. I'm so excited to see it and I can't wait to see how surprised he is. SQUEEE!

It's too bad you're a boy.

While my mantra for most of the weekend was, "Not okay. Not okay. Not okay. Not okay," I am feeling okay now. Cheruby was truly an angel and told me he loved me lots, gave me lots of hugs and took me out somewhere in Saskatoon I'd never been and we made out in his new car (new to him, not NEW) for a while. He took me out for supper at Calories, let me stay home from the grocery shopping trip, gave me some alone time so my thoughts could run amuck without interference, and helped me chip the ice off the front walk and back patio. He made me a fantastic supper of chili lime chicken kabobs and asparagus and made me feel okay about not being okay.

Okay. I hate war movies. They almost always leave me feeling upset and sad and cranky. I actually scared Ferlak with my reaction to Life is Beautiful. I am plagued with the unanswerable, "Why?" which ruins my typically sunny demeanor. I have enough emotional reactions to real life so why would I willingly put myself into a situation where I was watching men being slaughtered for two hours? It's still a frakin' war movie no matter how many sexy bodies are being shown. There were some great scenes, but all the blood and violence are not my cup of tea. And not only did I go see this movie, the previous movie I went to was Pan's Labrynth. Can someone please remind me the next time they see a fantastic movie that I won't like it if it's ultraviolent and about war. Pretty please.

The bits of the movie 300 that were great were the queen and the traitor in front of the council, "... may you live forever," and the two soldiers flirting while cleaning up the bodies on the battlefield. Heh. Rilla had a good giggle at me when I waved to one of the soldiers who was about to be decapitated. Did I mention ultraviolent?

Oh and in other trivia about the movie, one of my favourite TV shows Hex has its villain appear in this movie as Stelios and I noticed despite the long blonde hair vs. short black hair! I was impressed with myself.

Babyface was staying with us on Wednesday night and Rilla came over so we tried Cheruby's new Marvel game. We were learning so it took us a long time, but it took us an hour to get through less than a round of the game. I'm not sure, but I think it'll take too long for my liking. It was great to see him.

Thursday Cheruby and I rented a van and drove to Calgary with the rest of Ferlak's stuff that was being stored in my house. Babyface stayed at the house with the kittenses for company and food until Friday when he went back to P.A. to his family for the weekend.

The drive to Calgary was quite nice, actually. The day was clear and sunny and the roads were clear. As we moved west, we saw less and less snow and then we saw some new green growth in some of the fields! You hear that those from Far Away? It's almost safe to come back! We got in at the almost perfect hour for Ferlak to be almost done cooking us supper. What a sweetie! Baby potatoes from farmer's market, chicken baked with black olives and other yummy spices, and a Sante Fe salad which was ... interesting and not necessarily in a bad way. Ferlak really likes it so he shared.

Then he shared something else with Cheruby - Shadow of the Colossus. Very, very, very pretty. Cheruby now owns this game.

After Cheruby played around with that for a while, we listened to my iPod on shuffle and played a little Dracula where Cheruby kicked our butts handily. He has now agreed that if he's playing Dracula, there has to be some extra advantages for the hunters. It was a really good night.

Ferlak left for work early the next morning and Cheruby and I had a lazy day. We walked to Phil's for breakfast around 11. He played a little more Colossus killing while I wrapped presents for my niece and nephew and the Very Tall One and Ferlak. Ferlak can't open his until his birthday in July. Heh.

Then we went to the Sentry Box and Cheruby was overwhelmed with the selection. Sensory overload. We found this fantastic game that made us think of a few of our friends. Heh. It supports 2 to 12 players. I bought a few more decks for my Blue Moon game, but Cheruby shockingly left empty-handed after an hour. Then we went to a mall and left fairly quickly as we didn't find anything we wanted.

The next part was also fantastic. Spending time with my niece and nephew. My niece turned 9 last week. This was probably the most fantastic evening I can remember spending with her in the last few years. She was fun and listened and it was good. I gave her a birthday present or two. My mom got her the second book in a series of which I got her the first book. It's about 12 year olds so I was hoping the age thing would appeal to her. The books are called The City of Ember and The People of Sparks by Jeanne DuPrau. I also got her the Blueman Group Keyboard. The drum parts and other play elements are set about by motion sensors. Very cool. We taught her how to play Mary Had A Little Lamb. Then we had some fun making our voices go really high and then really low. The Glad garbage bag song (Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy. Hefty, hefty, hefty.) is really good for that. My dad and I used to have a lot of fun with it and my niece thought it was hilarious. After supper we went to the park and played tag. There were some teenagers there and it was really interesting to watch my niece observing them. It was getting dark so we headed home and read with her for a bit. I tucked her in and kissed her goodnight.

Cheruby and I left early in the morning. I had to wake up my niece to say good bye. Her only point of protest was to say it wasn't 8 yet. Usually she doesn't want to hug me because she's so upset that I'm leaving. I was very happy with her very sleepy goodbye hugs. She wouldn't hug Cheruby, but she did offer to shake his hand. I was very proud of her.

The drive home to Saskatoon was excellent as well. Great sunshine and good roads although I didn't particularly enjoy heading back into the snow covered lands of Saskatchewan. Cheruby and I sang and talked and read on the journey. And it was really good.

Cheruby played at Lydia's on St. Patrick's Day and then had a gig while I dined with Drang, Mrs. Drang, His Nibs, Kaz, and Rilla. We went to The Ivy and it was really yummy. I haven't had a delicious meal like that one in a really long time. I'll have to convince Cheruby to go out more often. It was a really good time and I haven't seen the boys together in a long time. They ditched us girls for a few games of pool which was no big deal because it's happened a few times over the years. They got back fairly late and we girls been served cocktails by Cheruby so we were all tired so folks just went home.

We got to play a little Low Life the next day which was very much fun as usual. Although the bigger monkey was quite sick, she held up well throughout the festivities. Cheruby headed out to his uncle's right from there. I got a phone call at home later from him as his car had broken down. We collectively witnessed three rollovers and one vehicle just in the ditch with no rolling action. The roads were completely horrible around Hague. I was driving as slow as 30 km/hr because they were so bad. And now it looks like Cheruby is looking for a new car.

Babyface and family came up to stay late on Sunday night as well. Baby Babyface is very cute indeed and I enjoyed talking with Mrs. Babyface.

I was supposed to have lunch with Rilla yesterday and lunch was had, but it wasn't as good as it was supposed to be. She missed her bus and I had a very small lunch time window with meetings scheduled for the rest of the day. Of course, today, I spent 95% of my time on the phone as well. Hopefully, I'm pretty much done with my massive meetings schedule and I think I am for a while. I hope I get to spend some time with her real soon. I've taken tomorrow off to play video games all day with Cheruby.

Thanks, Rilla!

This time, I have a good excuse for not blogging. I've been too busy with work and recuperating from work to do any blogging. Really. Okay, that's a bit of a lie as I've been trying to keep up with others' blogs just not my own.

Last weekend in Edmonton, I got to see Neuba and Kaz. It was so exciting to see their new house. Oh my, the parties that could happen there!! It's absolutely wonderful.

It was very nice to see Siochain's mom. She really is a wonderful woman. And Siochain is going through lots of stuff right now and is being very brave and tough. She's so much stronger now than I've ever seen her before.

I really liked not having a car because I was then at the mercy of those that were willing to chaffeur me around the city. I didn't have too much opportunity to just do what I wanted and I was really okay with that. I really needed an evening to veg so I didn't go to the KC game, but hung out with the M ladies instead. We were all in a similar mood in that we were enjoying each other's company without needing to entertain each other. It was perfect and exactly what I needed. I was sleeping so soundly that I didn't realize that Bne had made it home at all.

I did get to visit a couple of friends in Edmonton who had a lot of other people over. They're all so wonderful and I hope they realize that it isn't a reflection on them that I don't come up to game as often as some others from Saskatoon do. I really thought I could manage the intensity I wanted for the game there, but I couldn't. It's too tiring and I would rather just be me now that I have so many people to visit when I go to Edmonton. My trip to Edmonton in April is going to be whirlwindy, I'm sure. More days there means more people to visit, but it means I'll definitely have time to visit with my Auntie Cool.

While I was in Edmonton, we spent some time at a mall. Not usually my favourite thing, but I realized there were some things that I wanted to get and so we found a spot that would suit everyone's needs. I got a new bathing suit that doesn't threaten to let the girls free while doing aquafitness. I was very proud of that purchase as the regular price on the tag was $78 and I paid $25 including taxes. I've made a monetary commitment to going to the YWCA here for classes for the next three months. So far, so good. I went twice last week as my schedule permitted (too much overtime so I missed the Monday after work class). Next week should be better, but even if I go only twice a week for three months, I've still saved quite a bit of money. I'd prefer to go three times though because then Cheruby won't bug me about using the elliptical downstairs which is far more boring.

I also printed some copies of a great picture of Bne and Siochain. I had another thing on my list but I don't remember what it was, but it wasn't important because it didn't get done.

The work week was tough because I worked a lot of overtime which sucked big time. My own fault because I didn't get this particular project done earlier. It was really supposed to be done at the end of January which I thought was ridiculous. Now, I'm paying for it.

We tried to play In Nomine on Tuesday evening, but that didn't work very well. It was requested that I finish this particular ProJEct^TM that Cheruby and I were working on for quite a while. The finishing touches took about 2 hours which was much longer than it was anticipated only because I had to redo a bunch of the liner notes. Totally worth it though. Then there was too much drinking to roleplay well so we just called it a bust. We'll eventually play, I'm sure. Anyone want to join us on Tuesday evenings?

A colleague was finally informed this week that she wasn't really right for her position, but that she's very valuable so what would she like to do. Well she's now doing the job one step above those she was managing before. While it'll be hard for her, I think she'll do better things in her new position. The worrisome part is that I'm not sure what they are going to do with her position. Of course, until we figure that out, another team manager and I are going to cover her hours at the end of the day which with the DST change this weekend, means only an extra 1.5 hours for me in the day which is better than the 2.5 extra I did on Thursday and Friday. [sigh]

Lots of exercise and crying for stress release, and lots of support and forgiveness from Cheruby has made me a happier girl.

Cheruby and I are off to Calgary at the end of next week for a very quick trip. Thursday night will hopefully be spent with the Furlak and the Very Tall One with Friday night being with my family. I'm very excited about the trip and not having to be at work for a few days. It's my niece's birthday on Wednesday and I get to take her the fabulous prezzie I got for her two months ago.

Why is it that some people think that being mean is the only way they can get things done? We've gone above and beyond for a client who is continuing to rant and complain about how awful we've been. At the end of the day, we did the work for her employees so that their lives were disrupted as little as possible. All the same, she's being impossible. I've been with her until 8 o'clock several evenings this week and the one day I wasn't, she phoned and complained to someone else. I believe in the past week, my company has had over 100 hours working time on the issues that she created. Arrggghhh!

*******SPOILER ALERT - PAN'S LABRYNTH********
Went to see Pan's Labrynth last night. It was good. So, my feeling at the end of the movie wasn't sadness as I was told it would be, but more happiness that Ofelia was finally where she belonged. I felt bad for Mercedes because she was going to have to carry guilt around with her because she felt that she didn't save Ofelia. The main characters got what they deserved. Ofelia's mom got freedom, Vidal definitely got what he deserved, the baby won't in the hands of a monster, Mercedes and the resistance triumphed over the military stronghold, and Ofelia got to go home. And I get to believe in fairy tales. Unfortunately, the brutality of the rest of the movie was too much for me and I had to shut down a little so I didn't get the full spectrum of emotions I enjoy. I will have to make due with my memory of the good parts so I don't have to watch it again. I think the bad parts would wreck me if I saw them again. Not that I watched them the first time, but the sound of him stitching his own face just about made me leave the theatre.

*********KEEP READING HERE**********
I'm off to Edmonton on a jet plane tonight. I will see Bne, Kaz, Neuba, Siochain and her mom, Jenn & Owen, and hopefully Binary Kitten and quirkykitten. There are so many others that I will miss, but hopefully, the next visit will be a longer one where I can see more of everyone.